The block I didn't see coming

[marchnogirl]

When I started writing I was so naive and free and happy. I had no followers, no expectations, I just wrote for the sake of it.
Sometimes I miss that feeling, but now it looks like I can't help but constantly thinking "what will my readers think of this one? Maybe I shouldn't write it" and that really sent me into a spiral of negative thoughts. 

I used to see posts about writer blocks and I used to think that I'd be prepared for it; I knew it would come and I'd welcome it knowing it would pass. What a big pile of bullshit XD Here it is, the block, in all its glory, telling me I won't be able to write a single word again and it suuuuucks.

I know the theory, that it will go way, but damn, right now I look around myself and feel like there's no more space for me, I double-doubt every plot that comes to my mind, every word I try to write... I... it's hard. And I'd want to rant but all the new people in fandom are like I was at the beginning, so happy and carefree and I don't want to... I don't know, be the old lady who vents and brings everyone down? 

Oh boy. I feel weird in fandom right now... just leaving this here, hoping the more I'll talk about this the faster it will go away....❤️

Comments

[gracerene]

We've all been there!! It's definitely no fun to be in the thick of it, but in my experience, it's kind of one of those things you just have to wait out. Personally (and these things won't work for everybody!) but I find reading really, really excellent fic for my pairing can help reignite my feels. I also find it harder to get into the swing of writing after a long pause, so when I'm trying to ramp back up I force myself to write every single day, regardless of how I'm feeling. It doesn't have to be for long, I don't have any WC goal, and the words generally suck and will need to be edited or just trashed entirely once I edit, but just building that routine and momentum helps.

Getting caught up in potential reception is a much harder beast to tackle! For me, being a multi-shipper, I find the best way to work through that is to focus more on writing rare pairs for awhile, because I find most of that headspace is really tied up with Drarry, so writing a rare pair that I already know isn't going to have the same massive audience tends to free me up a bit. But it's definitely a thing that I still struggle with, and I don't really have great advice other than time and practice!

[marchnogirl]

Oh my god, thank you so much for your reply. I'm late replying back, but I've had quite the crazy past couple of months. And the block isn't finished at all, but at least one big part of it (my graduation) is over now! I feel more light-hearted now, thought when I try to write I feel blocked even if I have the idea and I like it ;-;

Your advice is precious though: I find that, just as you, reading helps me a lot. I had difficulties finding a fic really inspiring though, as if the block was extending a bit over the entire aspect of fandom... I've finally found a fic which hooked me up, though, and I think I feel a little bit more inspired?

As for writing for other pairings, I think you're right and I'd like to try that as well! Do you have maybe some prompt for me? Just for fun! Thank you so much again❤️

[gracerene]

I'd be happy to prompt you, but I'm not totally sure what you ship outside of Drarry! Today's Harry's birthday, and there's a little celebration going on over at harrypotter_birthdayparty! Maybe you could try writing a quick drabble for Harry pairing that doesn't involve Draco for that? Or even something gen. Something birthday related, perhaps? Totally just a suggestion! I'm also happy to give you something less time-specific. <3

[marchnogirl]

Thank you so much, gracerene! I couldn't do something in time for Harry's birthday but I was thinking about cross gen (I love Harry/Scorpius or Draco/Albus, Draco/James or Harry/Teddy etc etc).

[gracerene]

Weeeellll, if you wanted to look at the HP Next Gen Fests prompts and see if any of those cross gen prompts grabbed your eye (we've got several for all of those pairings), I hear the mods are SUPER cool and chill.... ;)